Sunday, January 31, 2010

Woe be the Flames

The Calgary Flames are struggling.

After coming off a nine game losing streak in a pitiful January, Flames fans look to the remaining season with great trepidation. This blogger steadfastly believes the Flames are a wild-card for the Stanley Cup along with several other sub-elite teams, but clearly Flames fans are approaching a consensus that this team is underachieving.

As with everything else in our society, blame needs to be assigned. Sutter, Iginla, Phaneuf; all have taken their turns under the spotlight.

I blame our rivals.

Rival: Edmonton
In the late '80s the Flames were titans. In a seven season span the Flames earned two President trophies, two Stanley Cup appearances, and leaguewide respect. Fueling this organizational and individual passion was the dynasty to the north.

Today, the former dynasty is in tatters. The shortcomings of their roster are exceeded only by the absurdity of their contracts. The Oilers feature the league's least talented captain, worst $7M centreman, ugliest defensive core contracts, terrible durability, worst free agent decision (Khabby over Roloson) and obviously, worst management. This team is cover-your-eyes awful.


The ultimate symbolism of the current state of this rivalry was a fight between Flame captain Jarome Iginla and Shelden Souray.



A fight characterized by power and courage; the Red corner showing integrity following an inadvertent injuring of his opponent earlier in the season, the Blue corner remaining too fragile to even withstand the fight. (broken hand, out indefinably)

State of the Rival: Pitiful

The Flames swept the season the season series against the Oilers, the first team either team has accomplished this feat.



Rival: Vancouver

With the Vancouver Canucks as the only other Canadian competitor in the division, as well as the defending division champion, the Canucks are an obvious choice for a rival. With deft skill in the forward ranks, a foil for Iginla in the defensive core, and a game fighter - they seem tailor-made for their role as rival.

The problem?
Douchebaggery.

The franchise has built itself on shamelessness.

At the risk of derailing the post into Canuck bashing, I must admit the Flames are not saints either. Daryll Sutter's 2004 team included their own brand of villany, but that brand was goonery. Oliwa beating up an empty-net goal-scorer that danced too much for his liking, Nieminen running Osgood in the playoffs, McLennan taking an axe to Holmstrom, Regher taking face-offs, and more.
But at worst the Flames are bullies in an otherwise brutal league.

This same Flames team honoured Trevor Linden in his final game, as Iginla emptied the locker room to return to the ice and shake the hand of the soon-to-be-retired Canuck captain.

Sadly, it appears the team's class retired with their respected leader.


This "fight" featured more preening from Kessler than fighting, as after taking a punch he resorts to an MMA-style takedown and then calls his opponent a coward after game.



Burrows is currently embroiled in a dispute with NHL officials who are making a concerted effort to control the disgrace he brings to himself, the officials, and the game with his diving.


After losing a lead to Chicago in the playoffs last year, the fans littered the ice with debris and Vancouver announcer John Shorthouse acknowledged the franchise has developed a reputation of being poor sports.


A stadium and crowd that condone the use of high-powered lasers against opposing goalies. Lasers that are illegal to point at pilots flying planes.


Spike, a men's tv station, posted a list of the 10 worst fans bases in North America on their website. Checking in at #5....
It’s remarkable how arrogant the fan base of a team with zero Stanley Cups, no Hall of Fame players, and two homoerotic Swedish twins that seem physically afraid of the playoffs can act. It’s literally mind-boggling! These days, when they’re not too busy demanding trades on local radio shows or reminiscing about that year they almost signed Wayne Gretzky, you can usually find Canucks fans preaching about how hosting Jarome Iginla and the Canadian Olympic team will finally establish their city as a genuine hockey town (sort of like how marrying Lamar Odom made Khloe Kardashian a real celebrity – legitimacy by association).

Next time you see a suspected pyramid schemer in the corner of a trendy wine bar sporting a $200 hair cut, $900 suit, and emanating a distinct air of scumbag from his Drakkar Noir-soaked pores - go ahead and ask him about Kevin Bieksa, because odds are he’s a Vancouver Canucks fan and doesn't want to cry himself to sleep again before throwing out obscene predictions about the Norris Trophy.


State of the Rival: Embarrassing

The Canucks do a disservice to their name, which is already a pejorative bastardization of Canadian.

Rival: Montreal & Toronto

The two original six Canadian franchises steeped in mystique are rivals mostly due to their widespread fan bases. Unfortunately, due to the MLB-style unbalanced NHL schedule, the proliferation of television broadcasting, and the sorry state the two franchises are in - neither team has the same cache they once did.

State of the Rival: Irrelevant
Short of meeting the Habs in a Stanley Cup, these rivalries appear little more than bragging rights among fans.

Rival: San Jose & Chicago

If the Eastern conference rival has lost its lustre, we shall look west.
The 'Hawks and Sharks are the two preeminent franchises in the Western conference and the Flames have played both in the playoffs in recent years. Still, neither feel like rivals to this blogger. Neither team considers Calgary a threat in the standings, both lack propinquity (too far away), and individual players have not interchanged.

State of the Rival: Weak.

These teams just aren't rivals. Flames fans don't hate the teams, don't know any fans, and it will take more than just another playoff series to cultivate a true rivalry.


How much of an impact will the state of these rivalries have on the Flames success?
Not much. Rivalries carry teams and fans during the "dog days" of a season, which is January in the NHL. Once the playoffs roll around there will be plenty of incentive for every team to be at their best.

2 comments:

  1. So, for conversation purpose... what is the best rivalry in the league? Or is it currently a league void of any great rivalries? I struggle with this question.

    Pit-Wash? Det-Chi?

    Mtl-Bos has always been a great one for Habs fans like me, and has delivered recently, in addition to it's obvious historic status, but certainly it's currently nowhere near the top.

    But what is?

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  2. Mtl-Bos not near the top of rivalries?

    I would argue that there are few greater hocky rivalries then this one.

    Not only the historical significance but also the numerous intense playoff matchups that have taken place between these two teams in the past decade.

    As for the top rivalries I would look at the following:

    Philly-Pit: It has the natural geographical rivalry (real blue-collar fans for both teams), the hard fought battles in recent years and top talent on both teams.

    Mtl-Bos: No two teams have played each other more, the players hate each other and the fans despise one another. It doesn't matter if it was the 70's or the last decade these two teams usually meet up and have epic playoff series. (not including the 2009 sweep by Boston)

    Det-Chi: Becoming relevant once again with the rise of Chicago. They have the historical original 6 rivalry and for now both teams have great talent to hopefully have this rivalry build for several more years.


    Could be/growing into great rivalries:

    Pit-Wash: Sure, they have the top two players on the planet, but do you get pumped because it's Pit v Wash? No. You get pumped because it's Crosby v Ovechkin. Either player leaves and the rivalry is over. Therefore, not a great rivalry at this point.

    NJ-NYR: Has the nice geographical rivalry between big brother (New York) and little brother (New Jersey). A very nice heated rivalry in the 90's that has gained some spark with the rise of the Rangers once more.


    I can't say I watch the Western Conference too closely to have an idea of bad blood growing between some teams (as you can tell by my choices).

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